Sunday, April 11, 2010

Time Away From Time

Spring break was great, but it's such a tease! Once I become adjusted to the pattern of waking up late and doing whatever I want to do, it's already time to return to I guess you could say my everyday life.
Without a doubt, my obligations at home increased, but it was time away from what the world wanted from me. I did what I wanted to do without anything fro the outside telling me that I had to do "this" by "this certain frame of time," also known as homework. It was nice just sitting down and playing my guitar for hours upon hours. It's nice spending time how I want to spend it. I mean I guess we all have a choice over how we want to spend our time, but there are certain obligations that are being held over our heads.
I worked hard at practicing (or playing rather) my guitar and I can honestly say that I've never been more pleased with my fingertips hurting.

Anyway, aside from that. I want to touch on the topic of how things have changed a bit around the household. My mom's health is slowly declining and she is now breathing with an oxygen tank. Thankfully, she still has her appetite and can walk from her room to the dining table for meals and medication. Her life at the moment consists of: breathe, sleep, food and meds. It's been hard watching her, but I know that Jesus is in control. I know it's really hard to grasp the concept that I'm putting my trust in something that seems to be too insane to consider realistic. I know that what I believe may seem unreal or fiction to others. Despite what others say, God has been the most real thing in my life.
1 Peter 4:12-13
Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.

1 Peter 5:6-11
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.

I want this to be my prayer: despite my own condition that I may always fully rely on God and not myself because who am I to think I'm able to do it on my own? Was it not by ONLY God's grace that he drew me to himself? Was it not God who put me into existence and had my days written before I was formed in my mother's womb?

He is glorious and mighty.

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